Sunday, September 23, 2012

Frustration

I hate feeling frustrated with people.
It feels like knots in my stomach, tightness in my throat, agitation in my limbs.
These body feelings are followed by swirls of self doubt:
          Do I have any right to be frustrated?
          Is the problem really theirs? or am I in the wrong?
          Do they care enough about me to want to hear my feelings?
          Will talking about how I feel result in a bigger conflict? a broken relationship?
I'm uncomfortable with the way things are now
and I'm uncomfortable with the potential consequences of making it different.
I'm stuck.

Thursday, September 13, 2012

breathing through it

breathe in through the nose --3 beats--
hold --3 beats--
breathe out through the mouth --3 beats--
hold --3 beats--

repeat repeat repeat

until the heart unclenches

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Accept the things I cannot change...

I feel desperate for him

I can see his potential
for a bright future
a meaningful life

I can see the road being taken
dark and broken
an unfortunate end

I want to save him

He is not mine to save